Sunday, March 22, 2009

The God Chronicles-March 2009

I know, the God Chronicles is supposed to be on the 20th. So, I'm a few days late. Although, judging from the fact that I haven't blogged in an entire month (where did the month go? Oh, that's right, we've been sick all month!), I'm guessing you weren't really expecting a post anyway. So, surprise, here I am! Okay, let's get started, here's what God's been doing this month around here...

This is my youngest daughter, Miss O. This is her new thing she does when she has done something that she knows she is not supposed to. I often find her walking through the house covering her eyes.

I can immediately walk into the room that she came from and see what she has done. For example, an entire roll of toilet paper in the toilet, stickers on the bookshelf, pen marks on the counter-top, playing with big sister's Leapster, using every wipe in the container, putting on sister's dirty underwear. Okay maybe that last one was a bit much. I'm just telling it like it is. That was this week.

It cracks me up because it is a dead giveaway, yet she genuinely thinks that if she can't see me, then I can't see her, which means that I can't see what she has done. I'm having a hard time telling her otherwise, because I kind of like being able to tell when she has done something wrong!

I wonder how often we treat God this way. How often do I just hide my spiritual eyes thinking that if I don't look at Him, he won't know what I have done? Or how many times do I see a need in someone else and instead of helping, I just hide my spiritual eyes and pretend that I didn't see?

As much as I would love to not tell her that I can still see her, it has provided a great teachable moment with all three of the girls. God still sees us, even when we try to hide. We are so much better off to just go to Him with our problems! And, we should use our spiritual eyes more often to see the need in others and ACT on it!

For more God Chronicles go here!

Friday, February 20, 2009

The God Chronicles-February 2009

I sat down to write out my God Chronicles today, but God started talking to me about something else. Something I wrote about almost a year ago. So, I'm going to use an old post today too.

See, my husband is away at a conference right now for 5 days. I have all three kids to myself for that time. I'm in a new city (well we've been here for a year now) with no family nearby and no close friends yet. So, I've been feeling all-alone in this. Truth be told, I guess I've been feeling kind of whiny. Which reminds me of this post. This is from my testimony blog Healing Hope. I hope it encourages you today, and I'll try to have some new material for March! :)

The Three-Year Temper Tantrum

I was having my quiet time and Bible study on March 28, 2005 and God spoke to me in a way that I still remember three (now four) years later. I wasn't even really listening to Him at that point, but I heard Him and I understood Him.

Let me give you a little background. I had a very protected and blessed life. I can't remember anything bad happening to me growing up. No illness. No death. No abuse. Nothing bad. I truly was spoiled. Not rotten, just spoiled.

When the first and only really bad thing to happen in my life happened when I was 24-years-old, it hit hard! I got used to things going my way. I enjoyed things going my way. This was totally new and I was unprepared.

When the doctor told us that our baby potentially had a fatal defect and would not live outside the womb, the walls of my world came crumbling in around me. I never thought that I was exempt from bad things, I just took God's protection for granted. I was in His Word. I prayed. I was growing spiritually. You just don't grow through normalcy the way you grow through adversity. I was totally unprepared for how much I truly needed Him.

The next 20 weeks of our pregnancy, I poured my heart out to God. I spent time with Him every day. I communed with Him all day, every day. I knew Him in a way I had never known Him before. I had so much peace in the midst of such turmoil and such uncertainty. I was seeking Him. I desperately needed Him. The problem was that I wanted Him on my terms. I wanted Him because He could heal her, and He was the only one who could. I wanted Him because I knew that there was no other way that I could make it through.

I experienced Him with such closeness that I decided I didn't ever want to go back to not "knowing Him". I wanted to continue that closeness and grow it until the day that I was looking at Him face-to-face.

Then He chose not to heal her. He chose to do things His way. He let me down, or so I thought. Jael was born. She died. I searched for Him. He didn't answer, or so I thought. I wanted His comfort. He didn't give it, or so I thought. This continued for 3 years, until that day.

In those three years, God had already blessed us with two healthy daughters. Things were going my way again. I didn't realize how mad I was at Him. I didn't realize that I was choosing to ignore Him. I didn't realize that I had believed Satan's lies. I didn't realize that I had given bitterness a root, and it was flourishing. Time passes quickly when we allow Satan a stronghold. As long as I was focused on the here and now, I didn't notice the absence of Him, or so I thought.

I spent time in His Word. I wanted to hear from Him. I just didn't want to hear what He wanted to tell me. I wanted answers, not Him.

Our second-born daughter was almost two-years-old, smack dab in the terrible twos and very "strong-willed" as some would say. We could not find any discipline that would work for this girl. She laughed at spankings. We physically had to hold her in "time-out". It was exhausting. We finally put a baby-gate on the door to her bedroom and removed all toy-type things. Whenever she would throw a tantrum, we would put her in her room and put the gate on the doorway. She could still see us, but she couldn't get out. All that was required of her was that she stop screaming, tell us sorry (in an almost two-year-old way), and we would come get her and comfort her.

This particular morning, she had one of those episodes. I can't even remember what it was about now, I just remember allowing her to get me very flustered. I put her in her room, but was so flustered that I forgot to put the gate up. I realized this a few minutes later, but wanted to see what she would do. She screamed in that room longer than I ever remember her screaming. I kept thinking come on child, quit screaming, I am right here waiting for you to stop crying. I want to hold you. I want to talk to you. I want to tell you that I am disciplining you for your benefit. It was killing me to hear her scream and not run in there to comfort her. She didn't realize that the gate was not up. She was waiting for me to come get her.

It was in my quiet time that afternoon that God reminded me of my daughter's tantrum that morning. You see, I had been throwing a tantrum myself. A three-year long one. I was screaming at God. I was refusing to listen to Him. He was wanting to comfort me.

I felt Him telling me that all this time, the gate was not even on the door. I didn't have to wait for Him. He was waiting for me. All I had to do was stop screaming, talk to Him, and walk into His open arms. No gate involved. It was all for my benefit. He was right there waiting to comfort me the whole time, and my screaming pained Him the same way my daughter's screaming pained me.

That was the day that I quit screaming at God, I told Him I was sorry, and I ran as fast as I could back into His arms. There were still strongholds to break, and issues to deal with, but I was ready to do things His way again. No more temper-tantrums.

Click here for more of The God Chronicles.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Memory Monday 2009-verse 4

"Blessed is she who has
believed that what
the Lord
has said to her
will be accomplished!"

Luke 1:45 (NIV)

For more Memory Monday, go visit The Simple Wife.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Question #31

In what area of your life do you most need change,
and what will you do about it this year?

Again, discipline!
This is something that makes a difference in all areas of my life!

I'm sticking to my daily quiet time, Bible study, scripture memorization, and exercise! Also, scheduling my "free time" so that I accomplish more!

Thanks so much for joining me in these questions! I've enjoyed learning more about some of you and I am excited to go into a new year with focus! I hope that you are too!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Question #30

What's the most important new item you want to buy this year?

Silly as it may seem, beds for the girls. Poor Miss C is in the toddler bed still and Miss O is in the crib still, time to move 'em on up!

Monday, February 9, 2009

Question #29

If those who know you best gave you one piece of advice,
what would they say?
Would they be right?
What will you do about it?

I was thinking that I needed to be an audience of one more, you know pay less attention to what others think and more attention to what God thinks. But then, I asked the husband what advice he would give and it was this. "Do your best to find the positive in everything." Which is totally true and I've been working on it more and more each year. I grew up around a lot of negativity and I struggle with it constantly! Half-full it is!

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Question #27 and #28

What's the single most important thing you could do to improve the
quality of your commute this year?

Well, I suppose I could walk more carefully down the stairs, seeing as how my commute is walking down to the basement to do school with the girls!

For those of you who do have a commute, my husband used to have a very long very frustrating commute through downtown in rush hour. He started listening to the Bible on MP3 and it helped tremendously. When I was in college and doing my student teaching I had a long commute and I relished that time as I would spend it praying for my day.

What one biblical doctrine do you most want to understand better this year,
and what will you do about it?

So many! I don't know about specific doctrine, because these "topics" incorporate several, but I want to learn more about heaven and believing God/Faith. I want to get some good concordances and study books. I also want to read Randy Alcorn's Heaven and do Beth Moore's Believing God study.